It has been over a year since I have blogged. I have been continuing to write but anytime I think to write in blog form for the “world” to see, I hold back. Unlike most people in my circles, I am heavily immersed in grief culture. Books, interactive journals, podcasts, forums etc. My finger has…
Tag: Child
The 95 day threshold
Sometimes we say things only because they sound right. I’ve said, “Now that Marigold is here, I couldn’t imagine losing her!” But that is just not true. I can imagine. And I do every day. Tonight I had a bath with Marigold, Nathan put on her jammies and I fed her as we rocked in…
Three gifts Eden has given me
Day 4 in our pilgrimage. One year after we introduced Eden to this world, we are left to retrace our steps- a pilgrimage through the 95 days of the year where we had all of our babies safe in our arms. Both blessing and curse, I wake up with reminders through Google photos on my…
Ruin & Restoration
I don’t think the term mixed emotions suits the situation. Conflicting emotions. Combating emotions. Anytime I feel like I have a solid foundation on the matter, the soil begins to sink and I am once again left treading water. Regardless of any conflicting emotion, Nathan and I are joyful and thankful as we announce the…
Two World’s
New Years hit me hard. I have been in a fog for a few weeks, unable to make sense of the mess of emotions that go on in my mind. My family got me into a writing class for those dealing with grief. All of my creative juices have been channeled into that course since…
Places you have come to fear the most
I have kept a journal since I was 13. My first journal was a 3-ring binder that I duct taped the outside of, then wrote BRITT in block letters on the cover. I would write a full loose-leaf page or two every day of grade 9. It is beyond embarrassing to read back on those…
Disjointed
I did not feel like writing this week. The next 10 paragraphs are completely disjointed. The absence of flow in this entry could be symbolic. I am all over the place this week. Constantly feeling conflicting emotions. So forgive me for the following fragments of thought. We had to acknowledge what would have been Eden’s…
Eden's Garden 